Relationships

In life we are surrounded by ethereal cords that interconnect everyone to everything. Each of these cords are defined by the Principle of Polarity. This means that everything is dual, everything has two poles, and there are two sides to every story. Between these two fixed points is a world of experience. In life we are born, and we die, but we have a life in-between. When we are young we are vibrant and full of energy, but as we age, decay sets in, and we begin to slow as our final days encroach. All things have two poles: be it life and death, light and dark, hot, and cold. Life is a complex matrix of emotion. It is an exploration of our humanity and an expedition through existence. What makes life so awe-inspiringly amazing? If you boil it down, the answer is: the relationships we experience with others. Life would be meaningless without relationships. Think about how powerful the experience of spending time with a loved one feels, now contrast that, to how intense you feel when in the presence of someone you despise. No matter how wonderful or miserable you may be in these moments, the raw energy of every encounter is incredible.

Life is about relationships. But the idea of relationships transcends people. It entails our ethereal connection to God, and even ourselves. When we apply the Principle of Polarity to relationships it reveals two poles: Connected and Disconnected. If we are connected, we feel whole, wanted, needed, desired, liked, respected, admired, and maybe even loved. When we are disconnected, we feel alone, deserted, lonely, isolated, disliked, hated or maybe even outcasted. Every silvery cord is a relationship, but we aren’t limited to a single relationship with every person we know. In new friendships we may only have one or two strings tying us together, but as the bond develops, our experiences weave a tapestry from dozens, if not hundreds of fibers. This is why we can be our lover’s friend and their romantic partner. The sexual, lovey bond is one string, while the intimate comradery of friendship is another. Each must be maintained and cultivated to ensure the pair bond is harmonious and mutually beneficial.

Unfortunately remaining aware of every string is challenging, and as each relationship grows in complexity, the tapestry becomes increasingly difficult to manage. How can we keep up with it? How can we harmoniously navigate life when at every turn we are being knocked off balance? We are bombarded with stimulation every second of every day through social media and mass communication. It is so pervasive and intense that people have a difficult time refraining from texting while driving. How can we expect to have an awareness of our relationships when many of us fail to perform a simple task, like driving safely? I believe we are in the greatest era of disconnect humanity has ever experienced. Sure, we may have instant access to everyone and anyone we have ever known, but a day filled with electronic messages, and memes are not a replacement for real human interaction. We can’t hear tone in a text, intent is often misunderstood, and few people possess the ability to convey their thoughts and feelings through the medium of written word.

Texting and social media creates the illusion of connection. Every “like” is an emotional jolt. It is candy, and we eat so much of it, many of us have developed Diabetes of the Soul. If we want to live a healthy, harmonious life we must eat more than candy. We need to have meaningful, deep, and heartfelt relationships. This means stepping away from our keyboard, leaving our phone in another room, and actually taking the time to truly, and honestly spend time with someone. I suggest investing in the act of holding space. The intent of this term is to help create a moment for someone to share something vulnerable and intimate. It is a request for others to hold their tongue, listen, receive, and absorb the energy being offered. This exercise is a great tool for those who are searching for ways to be present, to let go of all the distractions in the world and exist in the second. This investment comes with responsibility, we must actually be listening. We have to be there in body, mind, and spirit. We have to be doing more than just waiting for our time to speak.

In these moments, silence your inside zones. Feel the emotions move through you but remain focused on what is being said and how it feels to hear them. When you are holding space for someone it is not an opportunity for you to spout your opinions, offer advice, or convince them their perceptions are wrong. You are there to listen, to feel, and experience life in that moment. Holding space is a meditation of patience, presence, and empathy. It gives someone else the opportunity to feel connected. Think about that. We have the power to help someone alchemize their disconnection. We can help someone feel like they belong, that they are loved, liked, and connected. That’s amazing! Simply by listening and feeling the strings of the relationship we can help them heal themselves. Interestingly enough, this act of patience and compassion can help heal us too. We need to be needed, and in that moment they needed us. Relationships are beautiful. By opening the door for someone to feel connected we are opening the door to feel connected too.

Holding space is a really great meditative exercise, but we don’t have to wait for someone to ask us to hold space with them. We can integrate it into our daily life. This means giving other people more chances to share their thoughts and feelings than we ordinarily would. It means cutting our conversational points short to make sure other people have the opportunity to be heard. It means silencing ourselves in moments when we feel most compelled to speak. It means cultivating a conversation around them, instead of searching for ways to inject ourselves into the story.

Within the silence of holding space, it grants us the opportunity to feel the strings of our relationships more accurately. It grants us more time to see people as they actually are, instead of how we perceive them to be. It grants us more time to observe our personal boundaries and to enforce them. It gives additional time to articulate our thoughts to ensure our message is clear and concise. And truly, and perhaps most importantly, it strengthens our relationships.

As we learn how to integrate holding space into our daily lives, it opens the doorway to a greater understanding of the human experience. When we slow down, actively listen, and take the time to feel the emotions and words being shared with us, it grants us the opportunity to isolate how each emotion feels within our body. As discussed earlier, everyone is connected to everything via a series of ethereal cords. Collectively these strings weave a tapestry that defines every relationship in our life. Having an awareness of the interconnectivity of existence is important, but so too is understanding how the tapestry interfaces with our existence.

How are we connected to this tapestry? The tapestry is like a hammock, and it must be anchored to at least two points. In relationships between you and another person each anchor is connected to a specific emotional vortex. When vortices are out of polarity with each other it may lead to emotional duress for both parties. This is often witnessed in Orbiter Dynamics.

Whether a vortex is a real thing, or a metaphor is irrelevant. The term serves as a means for us to explore how we feel in a given circumstance. Words are tools to help us navigate the adventure of existence, if this word doesn’t work for you, use something that is more aligned with your spiritual or religious framework. A vortex is a whirlpool of emotional and spiritual energy that helps us experience the magnificence of existence. These vortices are often called chakras and their most common locations are the Crown, Third Eye, Throat, Heart, Solar Plexus, Sacral, and Root, but they may also be found in other areas of our energy body like the hands and feet.

When we take the time to analyze and feel the spirit energy move throughout our body, it helps us acknowledge and understand our internal relationship cords. This is important because it grants us an awareness of our existence. With this information we can become a cartographer of our own lands and build a road map to drive on the highway of life. This road map can be created through the cultivation of our awareness. When we experience an emotion there is often a physical sensation that accompanies it. The area in which we feel these sensations can help us understand how to process the emotion. It may also help reveal the nature of our relationship strings with others.